I don’t really feel comfortable talking about/explaining something so personal over Tumblr, especially on an anonymous ask. It’s really complicated. But as of right now, Kenny and I are not currently together with the possibility of getting back together when we can.
You put me first, and look where you are. You numba’ one in my heart, bbygirl. We just recently started what it is that we have, and I love it. I realized how incredibly immature I was always trying to prove something to you and Kenny. And the main reason for that is because I was so jealous of how awesome you are. I obviously am not going to get into it, because it’s personal. But you are the perfect friend for Kenny, and to me, and I couldn’t ask for more out of this. You are an amazing person. You’re smart, you’re clever, so charming, and SO funny. Not to mention how fricken cute you are. We have SO much fun talking, and you always cheer me up. I’m really convinced that we’re going to be friends for a long time. You have a humongous heart, and it’s in exactly the right place. You’re going to get everything you deserve someday, I’m sure of it. And now that you’re becoming one of my best friends, I’d really like if that didn’t change.
I have every reason to hate you. And I kind of do. I write about you too Goddamn much, and you already know how I feel about you. I have nothing more to explain other than I think youza dumb hoe. I love you with every little piece of my heart that doesn’t already hate your guts. KTHANKSBYE.
You are one of the funniest people I have ever met in my life. I don’t even feel like writing about you, either. You have always been there for me, and I doubt there will be a day that you aren’t. I know you want my teenage life to be as easy and fun filled as possible, and I thank you for that. We always have fun when we hang out, and I need you to pull me back down to earth when I start losing my grip. You’ve got a way with words and it’s the cause of all my problems. You’ve got your mind set, and that’s the way it is.
You came into my life in the roughest month of it. I met you in the beginning of 7th grade when I was dating Seth. You were the first person I knew with a Wii and unlimited access to his parents credit card. You are among the sweetest people I’ve ever met, and I know that you legitimately want the best for me despite how you feel about me. Our friendship is honest, and you’re the most understanding of my problems than any one of my friends. I want to thank you for every call you’ve taken after eleven or twelve and listened to me crying and complaining about everything going on, and for every difficult situation I put you through. I’m really thankful for our friendship, and we’re going to have such a fun time in Chicago.
It is as if we are just two people on a boat without oars. Drifting off into an unfamiliar place we don’t belong in. Even though we’re lost at sea, I know with strong enough limbs we can swim our way back home. Even if that place isn’t where we set sail. And when we’d get there, we’d kiss like shipwrecked survivors kiss the sand.
There comes a time in my life every so often when eating turns into something I only do to pass time. It’s somewhat uncontrollable. Because when I do eat, it makes me feel like my stomach is turning. Food doesn’t look, smell, taste, or sound appetizing in the least. Sometimes even the name of my favorite foods can sound absolutely repulsive. And then I feel like a total freak, because I can go two days eating half a waffle and feel absolutely fine. And then everyone bitches at me like I’m doing it for attention or like it’s just that easy to pick up the food and eat it even if I know I can’t. It’s not like I think I’m overweight. And people think that because I’m so skinny that I should have to eat 5 sandwiches every time I eat. No, guys. My body is somewhat petite. I have a smaller stomach. As much as I wish I could eat that much, I can’t. And I don’t know why. And I’m not going to go out and shove fast food down my throat, because fast food isn’t good for anyone. Even skinny people. I’m not sure what you could classify this as. Perhaps some sort of weird patterned eating disorder. But I do know that I am not proud of my body. When I look at myself in the mirror and see how thin I sometimes am, I feel sick. I don’t feel like a woman. I feel like a skinny little 12 year old boy. I’m scared to weigh myself because I’m scared to know. I know that this isn’t the way my body should be, and I haven’t always been this way. Actually, when I was 13, my best friend’s mom nicknamed me “The Bottomless Pit” because I ate so much. I’m 15 now, and I’m not sure what happened to me between then and now, but I think I’m going to have to get to the bottom of it.
This post was in no way meant for anyone to pity me over. I just needed to get this out for me.
His Best Friend: What makes you say that? What did she do wrong?
Boy: Well, for one.. She only cared about her appearance. Always had to look good, always took forever to get dressed! So insecure..
His Best Friend: So, you broke her heart because she wanted to keep your eyes locked on her? She wanted you to see that you have the prettiest girl under your sleeve and not think otherwise? I see..
Boy: Oh.. Well.. She’d often call me or text me asking where I am, who I’m with, telling me not to smoke, not to drink. She’s so clingy!
His Best Friend: So, you broke her heart because she cares about your well being? Because she cares about you a lot? And her greatest fear is losing you. I see..
Boy: But.. Uhh.. Well, she’d always cry when I say something slightly mean. She can’t handle anything. She’s a crybaby!
His Best Friend: So, you broke her heart because she has feelings? And because she just wanted to hear you say you love her? I see..
Boy: I.. Well! You know, she’d get jealous easily. I could barely talk to other girls! She’s so annoying! I had to hide it from her so she wouldn’t bitch about it.
His Best Friend: So, you broke her heart because she just wanted you to commit to her? She thought you were faithful, but you lied so she could find out later and hurt even more? She just wanted the guy she loves the most to love only her. I see..
Boy: Well, she..
His Best Friend: You broke up with her because she’s good for you? She just wanted the best for you? She’s broken now because you were selfish. Are you proud?
Boy: I broke her heart.. Because I couldn’t see what was happening.. What happened to me?
His Best Friend: You lost the girl that loved you like no one else could. You see? You didn’t want her when all she ever wanted was you. THAT’S what happened.
This was definitely written from a girl’s perspective. Let’s look this over really quick.
Firstly, you shouldn’t be dating someone who you aren’t morally on the same terms as. Boyfriends and girlfriends are supposed to be able to understand how they feel about certain things and just not do them. In my opinion, at least.
Secondly, if someone is crying about every little mean thing you say anyway, why would you want to stay with them? Not only is that a hassle, but nobody wants to tip toe their way through a conversation to avoid hurt feelings. At least, not in a relationship.
Thirdly, nobody should be lying to anybody. And if she really was faithful and wasn’t worried about him cheating, he wouldn’t have to lie about where he was going, who he was with, and what he was doing. And if I know girls, which I do, because I myself have had a similar problem, I know exactly what he was talking about. Because I admit having been upset about my boyfriend hanging out with other girls before, and it really shows an immense lack of trust and respect for both him and his friends. I am glad that I no longer have this problem, because it was a large inconvenience in our relationship. OH, and I don’t know why people are so convinced that being committed to someone means losing all of your rights to have friends that are of the opposite gender. And in some cases, all of your friends in general.
Sorry for the rant, but there are just so many things wrong with this. xD
“I know this is not very Christian of me but to the blue car who got on my tail then cut me off and some other cars, I really hope you ended up in a ditch and did’nt hurt anyone!”—Mom’s Facebook status.